What did the physicist say when he tried to meditate?

Ohmmmm, Ohmmmm, Ohmmmm...

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What did they tell the most famous child actress from the 30's when she tried to audition for a role in Harry Potter?

Shirley you can't be Sirius.

What did the bartender say to the girl that tried to steal a drink?

It was worth a shot.

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Why couldn't the physicist understand how boats work?

He thought nothing could possibly travel faster than sea.

Why did the scientist study soda?

Because he was a physicist.

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What did the physicist say when he tried to meditate?

Ohmmmm, Ohmmmm, Ohmmmm...

How do electricians meditate?

Ohmmmm, Ohmmmm

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What does an electrician say while meditating?

Ohm... Ohm...

How is a meditating monk and a fiber-optic cable similar?

Total internal reflection.