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What do ghosts use to predict the future?

Horror-scopes!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What's red, white, and full of holes?

Helen Keller's face after she tries to use a fork.

What did the woman say while she was having a baby?

This could use some salt.

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

What ghost is handy in the kitchen?

A recipe spook.

What directions did the ghost give the goblin?

"Make a fright turn at the corner."

Future Jokes More Future Jokes

What do you call a Mexican who can see into the future?

Cristobal

Why do people say children are the future?

They are clearly the present. Old people are the future.

Predict Jokes More Predict Jokes

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

What would you name someone who can predict when people sneeze?

Nostrildamus