What do ghosts use to predict the future?

Horror-scopes!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat?

You use a spirit level.

Why can't Helen Keller use an iPhone?

Because she's dead.

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

What do you call ghosts that haunt liquor stores?

Spirits

What did the ghost give his girlfriend on Halloween?

A "booquet" of flower.

Future Jokes More Future Jokes

Why do people say children are the future?

They are clearly the present. Old people are the future.

What is the Fonz looking forward to the most in the future?

The iPhone Ayyyye-t

Predict Jokes More Predict Jokes

What would you name someone who can predict when people sneeze?

Nostrildamus

What do ghosts use to predict the future?

Horror-scopes!