What do my iPhone and my girlfriend have in common?

They both go off again two minutes later to remind me of the same thing.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is the last thing that tickle-me Elmo gets before he leaves the factory?

Two test tickles

What is atheism?

A non-prophet religion Edit: Replace the word "religion" with "set of beliefs" if you're picky about that sort of thing

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

What did Jay Z call his girlfriend before they got married?

His Feyonce.

I Phone Jokes More I Phone Jokes

Why is Rose sad?

Because there is no Jack in iPhone 7.

Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone

Remind Jokes More Remind Jokes

Why don't gelding horses like to race?

Because every time they go to the starting gate they're reminded "They're Off!".

How do you make a sports science major cry?

Remind them that high school is over.