Why did the arborist plant new pine trees on their front lawn?

To spruce things up a bit.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense?

So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.

Whats the last thing you give a tickle me Elmo before it leaves the factory?

Two test-tickles.

Plant Jokes More Plant Jokes

Why did the plant say after being watered?

I'm not hungry exactly, but I could still use a light snack".

Why did the arborist plant new pine trees on their front lawn?

To spruce things up a bit.

Lawn Jokes More Lawn Jokes

What purrs along the road and leaves holes in the lawn?

A Moles Royce.

How do you keep the St. Louis Rams off of your lawn?

Paint an endzone on it.