What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both know when you are sleeping.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know if someone was in the navy?

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.

How long has your car been doing that?

Me: Hubs: The engine smoking at a stoplight Me: I dont know, I look at my phone at lights.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.

A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.

Why do cicadas stay up all night chirping irregularly, unable to sleep?

Their cicadan rhythm is off

Santa Claus Jokes More Santa Claus Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa Claus and your doorbell ringing at 3am?

It's your dad.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops at three Hos.

Bill Cosby Jokes More Bill Cosby Jokes

What happens on the first date with Bill Cosby?

I don't remember

Who is the only person able to knock out Ronda Rousey?

Bill Cosby