What does Michael Jackson have in common with a second place racehorse?

They both came in a little behind.

This joke may have profanity.

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How do fish make calls?

On a shellphone! My 7 year old self was very proud of coming up with this one....

Which came first, the Chicken or the Egg?

The Rooster

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What gets whiter as it gets dirtier?

Michael Jackson!

Why did Michael Jackson call Boyz II Men?

Because he thought it was a delivery service.

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What's the fastest animal in the world?

A chicken crossing Ethiopia. What's the second fastest animal... The ethiopian chasing it.

How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb?

30 because that's peasants work.