What do you call a melon that's had a bit too much to drink?

A Watermelon...

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a 16th-century seer who drinks straight out of the can?

No-straw-damus! (please be gentle on me as you berate me.)

When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?

The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."

Melon Jokes More Melon Jokes

How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon?

Melon-collie!

What type of melon would Romeo and Juliet have been?

Cantaloupe.

Watermelon Jokes More Watermelon Jokes

What do you call a watermelon in California?

A melon

Why can't watermelons get married?

Because they cantaloupe!