What do you get when you cross Christmas and a Duck?

A Christmas-Quacker!

What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig?

A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

Why did my family serve Eggs Benedict on a hubcap for Christmas breakfast?

Because there's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise.

Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What did Anne Frank say when she threw a ball at the water fowl's head?

Duck!

What did the duck say to the cashier after buying some red lipstick?

Just put it on my bill