What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Claustrophobia!

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What's the most messed up trap for Santa?

A Nicolas Cage.

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?

A Holly Davidson!

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What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?

Depreciation.

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What goes up a chimney down, but won't go down a chimney up?

An umbrella!

Why does Santa go down the chimney?

Because it **soots** him. Credit: Curious: The Tourist Guide