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Why is Santa always happy?

Because he knows where the naughty girls live. (a kid told me this one)

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Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

What's the difference between Santa and Justin Beiber?

Santa stops at 3 Ho's

What is Santa saying to Mrs. Claus right now?

I told you it would rain, dear.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why do barbers make good drivers?

Because they know all the short cuts.

How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

When my family says things like...why don't you have kids yet?

I say "Because I didn't get drunk & do the football team, Sasha."

Who names a kid after an activity?

Storms off w/ his son, Kegger

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the gamer wife told his gamer husband after they got divorced?

Good support in-game, bad in giving child support. gg no re

How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI?

The cigarette.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why doesn't Dwayne Johnson's downstairs neighbor understand references to current events?

He's been living under The Rock.

What do you call a two dentists that live on opposite sides of the world?

Molar opposites.

Naughty Girl Jokes More Naughty Girl Jokes

Why is Santa always happy?

Because he knows where the naughty girls live. (a kid told me this one)

Why is Santa Claus so jolly?

He knows where all the naughty girls live. I actually heard this in the video game LA Noire. Thought it was pretty funny so I bust it out every Christmas.