What is the best way to get to Paradise?

A. Turn right and go straight.

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How do you turn soup to gold?

Add 24 carrots

How do you turn German beer into American Beer?

Drink it

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Why is heaven a paradise for the common man?

Because all the politicians are in hell.

Why is Yahtzee better than the Bahamas?

Because it's more than a paradise.

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What's the best way to make friends?

Tell a woman you love her and she says "i think we're just friends..."

What's the best way to pick up a woman?

Like a sixpack