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What is the definition of a semicolon?

Something I usually have after a long night of drinking.

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Where do police put their drinks?

Copholders

Why does NASA drink sprite?

Because they couldn't get 7up

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What's the definition of Necrophilia?

The urge to pop a cold one.

What's the definition of divorce?

The screwing you get for the screwing you got!

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What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?

It was given two consecutive sentences.

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.