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What's black and is on top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking after a housefire.

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What's burnt to a crisp and at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

What happens to Stephen Hawking when he stops laughing?

He writes scary stories.

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Who has the fastest brain in the world?

Steven Hawking with a brake failure!

Where are you?

I said to watch him like a hawk! ME: soaring 20m above w/ a beakful of mice I AM