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What do you call a politician in a house fire?

Burning Sanders!

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How do fireflies lose weight?

They burn calories.

How long does it take to burn a candle down?

About a wick!

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What do you call a politician in a house fire?

Burning Sanders!

What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawkings after a house fire.

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How do you know when a politician is lying?

Their mouth is moving.

What did the cannibal make of the politician he just met?

Pork and bologne sammiches.