What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

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What's the difference between a Kindle and a Kindle Fire?

The Kindle Fire has a lithium battery.

What is the difference between a baby and a Mars bar?

About 500 calories.

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What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo?

Ones really heavy, and the other's a little lighter!

How do you recognize a blonde in school?

They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.

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Why did Leonardo di Caprio want Steve Harvey to host the Oscars?

He'd get it.

What's the difference between Leonardo DiCaprio and Sesame Street?

Sesame Street has an Oscar.

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What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black