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What time does a mechanic wake up?

Oily!

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What do you call the amount of time it takes to win an argument with a lawyer?

An attornity.

How do cows measure time?

In mooments

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What do you call a cat when he first wakes up with the alarm clock?

Catsup!

Why do you need patience at the gym?

Because there is a lot of weighting. *sorry. i woke up at 2 am with this in my head.

Mechanic Jokes More Mechanic Jokes

What does a mechanic do during a 1 night stand?

He screws, nuts, and bolts

What does a mechanic do for a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts.