Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs after a house fire?

Stephen Hawking's

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Whats a sign a subreddit has strong moderation?

Removed

Whats ur emergency?

OMG my neighbours cat is stuck on the roof-" 911: Ma'am, this is an emergency only service- "-of my sons mouth."

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What if Stephen Hawking is the real Slim Shady?

But we'll never know, because he can't stand up?

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.