Why is it hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

They always take things literally.

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Why are steak puns so rare?

Because they are never well done.

Why was the pun so offensive?

It was homophonic.

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What are the two things someone with a face tattoo never hears?

You're hired" "Not guilty"

Why was the monster standing on his head?

He was turning things over in his mind.

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What dies a little, when explained about?

A joke.

Who laughs the last?

The one who you have to explain the joke to.