Why did the dog scratch itself against the tree?

Ruff Bark

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why Chinese vet never hungry?

Dog have rice.

What does an insomniac, philosopher, atheist, dyslexic do at night?

Lay awake, contemplating the existence of Dog.

Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

How'd you get the scratches?

Flash back to me bathing my cat* -Uh, this chick bro. Yeah.

Why is your face all scratched?

My girlfriend said it with flowers. How romantic. Not really she hit me round the head with a bunch of thorny roses!

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What's worse than a baby stapled to a tree?

A baby stapled to ten trees.

What kind of tree smells like bacon?

Original) A Porcupine!