What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

Previous Random Joke Next

Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

Why did the man call his horse Fleabag?

Because he was often scratched!

Why can't DJs play pool?

They always scratch.

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

Why was the pregnant woman screaming "wouldn't, shouldn't, couldn't!"?

She was having contractions.

Whenever I'm bored I stop a stranger and ask "where am I?

And whatever they say I runaway screaming "Hahaha I'm a genius! I can teleport!"

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What is today's special at Google's employee cafeteria?

Alphabet Soup.

What is the date in Germany/Brasil today?

7-1. (World Cup)

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What do a coffin and a condom have in common?

They're both filled with stiffs one's coming one's going.

Why did Dracula's mother give him cough syrup?

Because Dracula was coffin. Source: A Laffy Taffy wrapper.

George Washington Jokes More George Washington Jokes

Where did George Washington keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

How did you do in your tests?

I did what George Washington did! What was that Went down in history!