Why did the programmer die in the shower?

He followed the shampoo instructions.

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Programmer Jokes More Programmer Jokes

How do programmers like their snacks?

Byte-sized.

When a programmer is born, what are their first words?

Hello world!

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why won't the US change over to the Metric system?

Because we'd rather die on our feet than live on your 30.48 centimeters.

What do you call a hundred year old man who dies in the library?

Overdue

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

Why are softball games so hard to follow?

Because everyone secretly plays for the other team.

How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

They don't change it. They just watch it burn out, then follow it around for another 15 years.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why didn't Natalie Wood take a shower on the boat?

She wanted to wash up on shore

What is the best part about showering with a 14 year old girl?

If you slick her hair back just right, she looks nine!