What's the reason my shower isn't working?

You have only one second to guess the answer. No pressure.

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Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What did Bruce Willis say to motivate his son?

Son, if at first you don't succeed, Try Hard. If that doesn't work, Try Hard 2. If that still doesn't work, Try Hard with a Vengeance. Remember, you can't pick between the choice to Live Free or Try Hard. They go together. Everyday's A Good Day to Try Hard.

What do you call a veterinarian that can only work on one animal?

A doctor.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

Where's my freaking phone?

And it answers, "I'm here! Under your jacket!"

What is a catchy Girl's name?

Annette

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What's worse?

Receiving a text from your girlfriend saying that you're breaking up or receiving a second text after saying that it was supposed to be for someone else

Why couldn't the police arrest the robber on the second floor?

Because he took the stairs.

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

Why did Gandhi lose the race?

I guess he got his fasts mixed up.

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

How do you get a hipster to take a shower?

Give them a leaky showerhead. You know, so they can avoid the main stream.

Why should you never take a shower with a Pokémon?

Because it may Pikachu.

Pressure Jokes More Pressure Jokes

Why has Venus been so distant lately?

Mars answers "shes been under a lot of pressure and has really bad gas"

Why was the diamond depressed?

He had been under a lot of pressure lately.

Reason Jokes More Reason Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness with a Unitarian?

Someone who knocks on your door at 6 a.m. for no reason.

When you see geese flying in V formation, have you ever noticed that one side of the V is longer than the other?

Well, there's a reason for that. There are more geese on that side.