What has 8 arms, is ominous looking and ink is its weapon of choice?

An octopus " "No Jeff, the answer is my wife's 4 divorce attorneys"

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4 Jokes More 4 Jokes

What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs in the evening and 6 legs at night?

I've trapped it in my bedroom, send help...

What is the difference between a girl from London and a Kitkat?

You only get 4 fingers in a Kitkat.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How many questions did the politician answer?

9/11

Why are there school shootings?

Mr.Garrison: "Let's start the day with a world news question. Why are there school shootings?" The media: "Violent video games?" Mr.Garrison: "Okay, now lets try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard.

8 Jokes More 8 Jokes

Why did the orange go to the doctor?

Because she wasn't peeling very well... All credit to my 8 yo son who suggested I post it here

What do you call 8 rabbits?

A rabbyte

Choice Jokes More Choice Jokes

What's the difference between "choice" and "choose?

Choice" is your ability to make decisions, "choose" are what Mexicans put on their feet.

What did the cocaine addict say to his drug of choice?

I'm kinda busy, I won't be able to stay any longer, smell ya later" PS: the addict died that day from severe delusions that his coke was talking blanket, lot of coke....

Weapon Jokes More Weapon Jokes

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?

Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.

What weapon is most feared by knights?

A can opener.

Ink Jokes More Ink Jokes

What did the valley girl say when her pen ran out of ink?

I LITERALLY CAN'T EVEN WRITE NOW

What movie should we see?

ME, SECRETLY TRYING TO HARVEST HER INK: Something super scary *I empty my popcorn bucket*