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Choice Jokes

What is the chupacabra's breakfast of choice?

Goatmeal.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

Your Age Is Only Math

What did the cocaine addict say to his drug of choice?

I'm kinda busy, I won't be able to stay any longer, smell ya later" PS: the addict died that day from severe delusions that his coke was talking blanket, lot of coke....

What did Bruce Willis say to motivate his son?

Son, if at first you don't succeed, Try Hard. If that doesn't work, Try Hard 2. If that still doesn't work, Try Hard with a Vengeance. Remember, you can't pick between the choice to Live Free or Try Hard. They go together. Everyday's A Good Day to Try Hard.

What is a proctologist's drink of choice?

Two fingers of whiskey.

What's a bear's preferred weapon of choice?

A Grrrrrrrrrrrnade!

What's an MLG's smartphone of choice?

An HTC One M8.

How about that airline food?

They give you two choices but their always out of one.

What is the Dothraki font of choice?

Kaleebri

What is the media of choice for the mallard?

Lololololololol-- --lololololol

What is Bruce Lee's beverage of choice?

WATAAAAAR

What is a ducks drug of choice?

Quack.

We've Got This Love Thing Down

We've Got This Love Thing Down

Why do they thank me in the cafeteria when I pay for my food like I had a choice?

Just tell me "enjoy the diarrhea" and I'll move along.

Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?

New Jersey had first choice.

When you have the choice between cleaning the bath or doing some sport... which series do you watch?

D

When does 2-1=0?

When you're talking about choices.

What are my choices?

He asked. "Yes or no," she replied.

What is a chefs weapon of choice?

A salt rifle

What is a Norweigan's compact car of choice?

A Fjord Fjocus.

What's the difference between "choice" and "choose?

Choice" is your ability to make decisions, "choose" are what Mexicans put on their feet.

What has 8 arms, is ominous looking and ink is its weapon of choice?

An octopus " "No Jeff, the answer is my wife's 4 divorce attorneys"

What is her Majesty the Queen's console of choice?

The Royal Wii.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What do you call it when Darth Vader moves one foot?

The Imperial March

Why are spiders good swimmers?

They have webbed feet!

Drug Jokes More Drug Jokes

What is it about glow sticks that makes me want to dance in a field wearing fairy wings?

If only I hadn't taken so many drugs I'd know this.

What kind of drugs do ducks use?

Quack.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What do you call a stay-at-home parent?

Unemployed.

How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why are fish so smart?

Because they live in schools!

What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?

A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Htc M8 Jokes More Htc M8 Jokes

What's an MLG's smartphone of choice?

An HTC One M8.

Which phone is most sold in Australia?

The htc M8. Oi mate

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What did Bruce Willis say to motivate his son?

Son, if at first you don't succeed, Try Hard. If that doesn't work, Try Hard 2. If that still doesn't work, Try Hard with a Vengeance. Remember, you can't pick between the choice to Live Free or Try Hard. They go together. Everyday's A Good Day to Try Hard.

How does someone with amnesia tell a joke?

I don't remember.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

What did Bruce Willis say to motivate his son?

Son, if at first you don't succeed, Try Hard. If that doesn't work, Try Hard 2. If that still doesn't work, Try Hard with a Vengeance. Remember, you can't pick between the choice to Live Free or Try Hard. They go together. Everyday's A Good Day to Try Hard.

What did the booger say to the finger?

Pick on someone your own size.

Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

Why did the vampire stand at the bus stop with his finger up his nose?

He was a ghoulsnif fer.

Why do people with no arms have difficulty remembering?

Because they can't put their finger on it.