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Why didn't the rock make it to work today?

He was stoned

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Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you call a seamstress who makes things up?

A *fabric*ator. It was a slow day at work...

Why couldn't the accountant keep his car in working order?

Because it broke down and he couldn't budget.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Where'd ya get it?

The parrot says, "Africa." (I don't know if you know this one, but I just heard it today)

How many paranoids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who wants to know?.... saw this joke in today's

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

Why didn't the rock make it to work today?

He was stoned

What does a rock put on when it stinks?

Geodorant.

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

Why didn't the rock make it to work today?

He was stoned

What happens when you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia?

You get stoned.