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Why does it take Sarah Palin so long to get ready in the morning?

Because she has two faces.

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Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

Whats the difference between a chickpea and a lima bean?

I've never had a lima bean on my face.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What does a gang member do when he arrives at work first thing in the morning?

He Glocks in

What has four limbs in the morning, two limbs in the afternoon, and is dead by evening?

A disobedient slave.

Sarah Palin Jokes More Sarah Palin Jokes

How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house?

She didn't, it was just an Aleutian.

What do the Iron Man suit and Sarah Palin have in common?

They've both had a downy inside em.