Why is she so loud?

Wife: That's how she talks. Apparently she speaks fluent pterodactyl.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why is a good husband like bread dough?

Because his wife needs him.

How many pull-ups can you do?

Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses Me: Almost 1.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why did the hipster break up with her boyfriend?

He didn't have all the 7" he kept talking about.

How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three. 1 to screw it in and 2 to talk about how much better Neil Peart could've done it

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

What language does a boxer who punches jokes speak?

Punjabi-ng.

How do you call a person that speaks only one language?

An American