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How many pull-ups can you do?

Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses Me: Almost 1.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do you call a man whose wife was the Queen, his daughter a Princess and his boss an Emperor, but he himself is no royal?

Darth Vader.

Why couldn't the guy with insomnia have an affair with anyone's wife?

Because he couldn't sleep with anyone.

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

How many pollocks does it take to paint a house?

1 to hold the brush and 1000 to turn the house!

What did the number 1 say to (pi)?

Let's get rational you can't carry on like this!

Witness Jokes More Witness Jokes

Why does Jehovah need so many witnesses?

Sounds like a pretty shady dude to me.

What's the proper procedure when witnessing someone having a seizure in a bathtub?

Sprint to your room, grab all the dirty clothes you can, and start saving money on laundry.

22 Jokes More 22 Jokes

How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?

22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

What should we call ourselves?

How about 22 pilots "Idk. Seems like an awful lot of pilots" 21 pilots "Omg"