Witness Jokes

Why don't Jehovah Witnesses like Halloween?

Because they don't like random people knocking on their doors

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What does a War Boy from Mad Max say when he goes to court to sign an affidavit?

WITNESS ME!

What is your date of birth?

Witness: "July 15th." Lawyer: "What year " Witness: "Every year."

How many pull-ups can you do?

Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses Me: Almost 1.

What happens when you witness a shipwreck?

You let it sink in.

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Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What do you call a child who doesn't believe in Santa?

An eggnogstic

Where is the lost city of Atlantis?

Lantis. I can't believe nobody has thought to look there yet.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

Why do you bury lawyers 20 feet deep?

Because deep down they're good people

What happens to lawyers after they die?

They lie still.

Max Jokes More Max Jokes

What does a War Boy from Mad Max say when he goes to court to sign an affidavit?

WITNESS ME!

How does a blonde call for her dog?

She puts two fingers in her mouth and then shouts "Max!".

Sign Jokes More Sign Jokes

What color are apples?

BOBO THE GORILLA: (signing) Please free me from this prison ME: (writing) Still struggling with colors

How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

You take the pizza delivery sign off

Odor Jokes More Odor Jokes

What did the German Shepherd say at his Nuremberg trial?

I was just following odors.

What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

Odor in the court!!!

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

Why can't iron oxide get a date?

Porque es FeO Little bilingual chemistry joke for you guys.

What's the worst single thing you could do to someone?

Start dating them

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

Why did the door to door sales man get nervous and run away?

He was selling In-Security Heh yeah i dunno i thought it up in a dream and I'm still half asleep bye

How do you know a drummer is at your door?

The knock speeds up.

Shift Jokes More Shift Jokes

Why keyboards... Why keyboards don't sleep?

Because they have two shifts!

Why couldn't the laptop go to sleep?

Because it has two shifts.