Why should we make Gabe Newell president?

There won't be any World War 3. #gaben2k16

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Why doesn't Gabe Newell play basketball?

Because he can't make 3's

What's Gabe Newell's favourite game?

Angry Nerds

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Who should we vote for the next president?

Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3.

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

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Why did Europe start the first World War?

They did't like being sans-Ferdinand.

How do you get Americans to join a World War?

Tell them it's nearly finished.