Gabe Newell Jokes

What's the difference between Gabe Newell and a toddler?

A toddler can count past two...

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

Who should we vote for the next president?

Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3.

Why doesn't Gabe Newell play basketball?

Because he can't make 3's

What's Gabe Newell's favourite game?

Angry Nerds

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What do you call it when a video game character gets hair on his body?

Q*berty. (my kids wrote this!)

How do '90s kids count to 6?

Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, cinco, seis.

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What did the poles do during world war two?

They held the telephone wires off the ground.

Why did Europe start the first World War?

They did't like being sans-Ferdinand.

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What do you call people who play April Fool's jokes?

Annoying.

Why is it so hard to play cards in the jungle?

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Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

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Who placed 3rd for basketball in the 2016 Olympics?

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What does a Chihuahua play basketball with?

A tennis ball!

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What do they call traffic laws in 3rd world countries?

Guidelines

Why do pencils shave?

To look sharp. Credit: 3rd grade me.