Vote Jokes

What do Japanese people do when they have erections?

Vote!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do Japanese people do during an erection?

They go to the polls and vote.

What's the best way to receive down votes on reddit?

Wohahaha! That was funny!

Why is India surprised by the Brexit vote?

They didn't know you could get Britain to leave by voting.

What is the main reason people are voting for Brexit?

When asked if they want to be economically joined with Greece, all they can say is "eeeeuuuuuuu"

What do you call a person with no skin?

Dead. Another anti-joke by the fabulous me. Surprisingly, nobody has down voted the first one yet.

Why is Dubya voting Republican this year?

So he'll only be the second worst president ever.

Who did Alaska vote for?

Berrrnie Sanders H/T: wife

Why are millionaires bad at swimming?

Because they drown at their own wealth Edit: I got down voted :(I thought of that in my head and just wanted to share it

Why can't cats vote?

Because they are non-voting felines!

How many Scots didn't turn up to vote?

One in Fife

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What do phone books and women have in common?

They both couldn't vote before 1920

What do you call a pig that votes?

Polled pork.

What does a Japanese man do when there's an erection?

He votes!

What is the most up-voted comment of all time?

Repost

Who should we vote for the next president?

Gabe Newell. There will never be a World War 3.

What's a horse's number one priority when voting?

A stable economy...

Why can't horses vote?

Cause their answer is always 'nay'. I'm sorry, I'll leave...

Why is Monica Lewinsky going to vote Republican this year?

Last time she tried Democrat it left a bad taste in her mouth.

What does an Asian man do during an erection?

Vote.

What is a horses number 1 priority when voting?

A stable economy

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

How many Mormons do you take fishing with you?

Two. If you only take one, he'll drink all your beer.

What do you call a drink with problems?

Dilemmanade

Helen Keller Jokes More Helen Keller Jokes

How did Helen Keller's mother punish her?

She left a plunger in the toilet

Why does Helen Keller play piano one-handed?

She sings with the other hand.

Care Jokes More Care Jokes

What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?

I don't know and I don't care.

How do Canadians take care of their skin?

Maybe it's maple leaf.

Japanese Jokes More Japanese Jokes

Why does Jesus like Japanese food?

Because he loves miso

What do you get when you combine two Japanese demons?

A two-eyed onion.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a cow that's missing a leg?

A 3 legged cow

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

Japanese People Jokes More Japanese People Jokes

Why do Japanese people have slanty eyes?

Atomic bombs are realllllly bright.

What do Japanese people do when they have erections?

Vote!

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

Why is it important to have plenty of help when changing a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.

How long did it take Goku to change a lightbulb?

20 Episodes and Krillin dies.

Definition Jokes More Definition Jokes

What is the definition of "moon"?

The past tense of "moo"!

What's the definition of a Polygamist?

Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!