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What's the difference between Britain and Australia?

When one votes, it changes something, making things worse. When another votes, it doesn't change anything, making things worse.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a blimp and 365 used condoms?

One's a Goodyear, the other's an awesome year.

What's the difference between Elton John's chin and Tiger Woods?

Tiger Woods hasn't hit as many balls.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

Why does Tom Hiddleston only invite his closest friends/family to his birthday?

He likes to keep things low key.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

Why did Kyle Crane have to change the lightbulb?

Because he had a dying light

What happens when U change position too fast?

You get an unpleasant vowel movement.

Australia Jokes More Australia Jokes

What's the difference between Britain and Australia?

When one votes, it changes something, making things worse. When another votes, it doesn't change anything, making things worse.

Which country's currency weighs as much as it's worth?

Australia. Because five $0.20 coins are about half a pound.

Britain Jokes More Britain Jokes

Why did all of Britain stop smoking pot?

Because they all joined

Why does America spell some words differently?

They said "We can do it without u, Britain."