How many Soviets does it take to change a light bulb?

None! In Soviet Russia, light bulb changes you!

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Change Jokes More Change Jokes

Why do traffic lights never go swimming?

Because they spend too much time changing.

Why did the stoplight turn red?

Well, you would too, if you had to change in front of that many people!

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many light bulbs does it take to change a person?

None. Light bulbs don't change anything.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

How did the Allies have time to prepare D-Day?

Because Russia was Stalin

Why was Edward unable to get out of Russia?

Because he was Snowd en! (according to my friends this joke has been around for awhile, but I hadn't seen it yet, and wanted to share the goof)

Soviet Jokes More Soviet Jokes

Which is the most communist vegetable?

The soviet Onion

Why do Soviets use lowercase letters?

Because they don't understand CAPitalism

Soviet Russia Jokes More Soviet Russia Jokes

What fabric is worn in Soviet Russia?

Linen

Why didn't anyone drive stick in Soviet Russia?

They were afraid of Stalin.