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Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

When did Pinocchio learn he was made of wood?

When his hand caught fire!!

Which hand would you use to pick up a dangerous snake?

Someone else's!

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why can't you trust a snowman?

Because they're all a bunch of flakes

Why cant you trust an atom?

Because they make up literally everything

Mention Jokes More Mention Jokes

How do you start a conversation about men's rights?

Mention feminism.

What a glum face what would you say if I came to school with a face like yours?

Pupil: I'd be too polite to mention it!