Why wouldn't the pimp water his lawn?

He couldn't trust his hose.

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Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What kind of water do ducks drink?

Bottled Waddle.

What's the creepiest body of water?

Lake Eerie. Note: This joke has probably been made before.

Hose Jokes More Hose Jokes

Why is a firetruck red?

You'd be red too if you had your hose stretched that far

What did Carlos the fireman name his twin newborn sons?

Jose and Hose B.

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why does that sign say Grand Canyon?

Are you sure this is the right way Lemming: Just trust me, ok

Why can't siamese twins be trusted to render fair judgments?

Because they're always partial. I'm so sorry.

Lawn Jokes More Lawn Jokes

What do you do when you see a half dead native man crawling across your lawn?

Stop laughing and reload

How do you drive a Unitarian out of town?

Burn a question mark on their front lawn.