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Why would you be scared to get Ebola?

You haven't left your couch since 2011.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the Men's Right's Activist say when he left his piano out in the rain?

MUH SOGGY KEYS!

What happened when the Pillsbury Doughboy's girlfriend was left out too long?

He had a stalemate.

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

What did the hipster say......when he was told to get off the couch?

Nah-imma-stay

What did the hippie say when he was kicked off the couch?

Namaste

Ebola Jokes More Ebola Jokes

How do you call someone named olaf with ebola?

Ebolaf

What's the difference between my ex girlfriend and ebola?

At least Ebola will finish me off