First of all you'd need a girlfriend to begin with.
She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.
Wha suh b?
Katie Keurig. (I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)
Michael Jackson
Life.
When it begins to bark.
A 4chan teller.
A 4chan teller
A teabag stays in the cup longer
Batman can go to the store without robin Edit: glad you'll liked it