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Mayonnaise Jokes

What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator was opened?

Close that damn door! Can't you see I'm dressing??

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I Love Pizza & You

What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise?

Lmayo!

What do you call a jar of mayonnaise stuck in quicksand?

Sinko de mayo

What does the mayonnaise say to the refrigerator?

Shut the door im dressing

Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What did the mayonnaise say to the man opening the fridge door?

Don't look. I'm dressing.

What do you get when you combine mayonnaise and bologne?

Bolognese sauce

What's the difference between mayonnaise and sperm?

Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back if my girlfriend's throat at 60 miles per hour.

What did the mayonnaise say to the refridgerator?

Close the door, I'm dressing!

What's the difference between a jar of mayonnaise and France?

If you leave the jar alone for 200 years it'll develop a culture.

What did Shawn like most about his trip to Paris?

He said it was lovely to hear the French pheasants singing the Mayonnaise.

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What is Cole's law?

Thinly sliced cabbage with mayonnaise