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Satan Jokes

How do you know Satan's barbeque ribs are good?

Cos they're trident tested. #noapologies

Love Card

Love Card

What game do M Night Shymalan's family play at Christmas?

Secret Satan.

How did Satan turn an unbeliever holy?

He scared the hell out of him.

Why did Satan need life alert?

Because he had fallen, and could not get back up.

Why doesn't God want to argue with Satan?

Because Satan has more politicians to help him.

What's Satan's main social media site?

Pentagram

Why does it take so long when Satan is in front of you in line at the post office?

Because the devil takes many forms.

What internet provider does Satan use in hell?

Comcast

Where's the election victory that you promised me?

Satan: Where's the soul that you said you had

What did Satan name his new bar?

The BeelzebPub

Why did Satan keep growing his herb garden even when his oregano died each time?

Because he always had a Hell of a good thyme.

$Your Age Is Only Math$

Your Age Is Only Math

What did the dyslexic kid say to his parents at Christmas?

I love Satan

What is Satan's favorite headset?

S810.

Whatcha makin'?

God: Trust. Man can use it to form lasting bonds and friendships. What you making Satan: A bong.