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How can you tell the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?

The picture doesn't scream when you hang it.

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Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Where do cows go to hang out?

The slaughterhouse. Emphasis on **hang**.

What was the last thing Robin Williams said to his wife?

You go on to bed, I'm just going to hang here a while.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What is every young ladys ultimate Disney fantasy?

To sit on Pinnochios face and hope he tells lies.

Who can't tell the difference between short and long?

This subreddit mods

Picture Jokes More Picture Jokes

Why do you look surprised in all your selfies?

Didn't you know you were taking the picture

What does cheese say when you take its picture?

Make sure you get my Gouda side!

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

Why can't Ewoks yell and scream in the house?

They have to use their Endor voices.

What is a vampire's favourite soup?

Scream of mushroom!