What did the hammer announce over the intercom to the evacuating screws screaming for help?

This is not a drill!

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Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What is Dracula's favorite pudding?

Leeches and scream.

What's white and red, 3 inches long, and makes dudes scream and run away when you show it to them?

A positive pregnancy test.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend?

A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!

What is trees' preferred drug?

Water. It helps them get high.

Drill Jokes More Drill Jokes

What did the fireman say when he noticed his hammer was on fire?

This is not a drill.

Why did the fisherman drill a hole in the ice?

For the Halibut

Evacuate Jokes More Evacuate Jokes

Why are women and children evacuated first in an emergency?

So the men can think of a solution in silence.

Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency?

So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke.