How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

His lips are moving.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A nervous wreck.

What lies on the ground 100 feet up in the air and smells?

A dead centipede.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What is UK's favorite song line?

And I'll tell you all about it when I EU again.

What do you say to a woman with a black eye?

Nothing. She's already been told.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What happens when a lawyer dies??

Who cares!

Why don't lawyers play hide-and-seek?

Nobody will look for them.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Why do hipsters burn their lips when they drink tea?

Because they drink it before it's cool.

What signal tells you that a politician is lying?

The lips are moving