How can you tell when Mitt Romney is lying?

His mouth is moving.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What's yellow and lies in a pond?

Disclaimer: I don't know how well this joke will work in English. What's yellow and lies in a pond? An excevator. You don't think this is funny? Neither does the operator.

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if someone who's having a temper tantrum is on the phone?

You get a tizzy signal!

How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

Why are you stuffing all that Easter candy into your mouth?

Because it doesn't taste as good if I stuff it in my ears.

Why did the cowboy brush his teeth with gunpowder?

So he could shoot his mouth off.

Mitt Romney Jokes More Mitt Romney Jokes

Who says Republicans aren't into recycling?

Mitt Romney's thinking of running for President, again.

What's Mitt Romney's favorite make of vehicle?

A Mack truck, because it already has a little dog on top.