How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

Is just not as challenging since she started using foursquare.

What does it mean when a lion roars?

Shut up. The movie is about to start.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

How'd you get amnesia?

4yo:.. Me:.. 4yo: I don't remember. Me: Well played..

Why can't you be the king I know?

The king you have inside you SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king.

God Jokes More God Jokes

How do we know God is not a woman?

Because the Earth is not a sandwich!

Why did religion cross the road?

God is the answer.

Bedtime Jokes More Bedtime Jokes

How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

What time is bedtime at Neverland Ranch?

When the big hand touches the little hand.