How did the U. S. elect an Orange as president?

Gerrymandarin.

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How many Americans does it take to screw a lightbulb?

None. Their President outsources the job to India.

Which bird ran for President?

H. Ross Parrot

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Why couldn't the apple speak to the orange?

Because he didn't know Mandarin

How about baked chocolate cake?

Nah" "Yummy choccy bake " "No" Guy who named the orange: I have an idea...

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What makes perfect sense?

The U.S. mint (cents)

How does Romney only claim a 14% tax rate?

He claims 47% of the U.S. as dependents.

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Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

Why do you need to be 35 to be elected president?

So women don't get elected.