How do you guys tweet from the toilet?

I poop with both hands.

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Poop Jokes More Poop Jokes

What does a witch take when she can't poop?

Hexlax

What did the poop say to the pee when he was hitting on her?

I may be a two but your an eight..

Toilet Jokes More Toilet Jokes

What did they find floating in the toilet of the S.S Enterprise?

Captains Log

What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet?

Wait until he's finished.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What did the cashier say after handing down a wad of currency to Dracula?

Count Dracula.

How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What am I doing with the rest of my life?

I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...

How do you guys tweet from the toilet?

I poop with both hands.