Poop Jokes

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

Poop.

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How do you write poop in Australia?

Dood

What do you need to poop in the forest?

Toiletries

What time do monkeys poop?

Tree turdy.

What did one poop say to the other poop?

You smell

Why do bears poop in the woods?

So nobody will see their bare (bear) bottom!

What did the poop say to the pee when he was hitting on her?

I may be a two but your an eight..

What did the Baskin-Robbins manager say to the employee that wanted to date a co-worker?

Don't poop where you scoop.

Why couldn't the poop get flushed down the drain?

Because it was deterred.

What did Captain Picard call his poop?

Captain's log

What does a witch take when she can't poop?

Hexlax

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What did Noah do with all the poop?

Threw it overboard. it formed the UK. Taken from here:

Who's there? Orange. Orange who?

Orange you glad I painfully waited until I was done cooking your food to take a poop?

How bad is it to poop your pants?

It Depends

What do you give and take at the same time?

A poop

What's the difference between a bucket of poop and a lawyer?

A bucket.

How do you guys tweet from the toilet?

I poop with both hands.

What do you call a notebook where you record information about your poops?

Some people may call it a log journal, while others call it a diary-a.

How do you fail a urine test with a clean sample?

Poop in the specimen cup.

What is a small, one story home made of poop called?

A dungalow

What do you call it when your Stepmother poops?

A Step-Stool

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What is it called when a hacker poops?

Logging out

What do you call a poop that went to med school?

Dookie Howser

What do you say when a singer/songwriter poops on your car?

CELINE WUT R U DION

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Conversation Jokes More Conversation Jokes

What does Facebook and a conversation between two teenagers have in common?

A lot of likes

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

Conversation

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

What do you call a guy who does not fart in public?

A private tutor.

How's a fart and a teenager alike?

Because once you go to sleep, you can't trust either of them to not sneak out.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

How can you tell a dog from an elephant?

The elephant remembers.

How many more times will I watch "A Walk To Remember" tonight?

As Mandy Moore times as I want to.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a guy who falls into a Yellowstone hot spring?

Stew.

Why'd the guy panic and call 911 when he realized an ocean was forming around him?

It was an emergent sea.

Fix Jokes More Fix Jokes

What does the cabbage merchant use to fix his cabbages?

A cabbage patch! - Sokka

How did the pirate fix the hole in his pants?

He used an eyepatch

Humor Jokes More Humor Jokes

What do you call a pizza who's a DJ?

DJ Beazza Yes it's a stupid pun, but that's a good 50% of my humor, the other half being sarcasm.

What do you call corn with a sense of humor?

Laughing stalk

Excuse Jokes More Excuse Jokes

What did the pony say after he coughed?

Excuse me, I'm a little hoarse.

What excuse does an Ape give for abducting a pretty girl?

I can't help it - she brings out the beast in me!

Poope Jokes More Poope Jokes

What did the scientist see when he looked up his family tree?

A gorilla pooped on his face.

How do you get out of the stomach of an elephant?

Run around until you get pooped out