How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why do ISIS fighters only drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the French Press. (This joke used to be more topical)

How did the pirate fix the hole in his pants?

He used an eyepatch

Profit Jokes More Profit Jokes

What is the difference between Elon Musk and Tony Stark?

Stark industries has actually turned a profit

How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)

Determine Jokes More Determine Jokes

How did the doctor determine that the baby was affected by the Zika virus?

It was a no brainer.

How can you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

You ask them to pronounce unionize.

Coworker Jokes More Coworker Jokes

When a coworker tells everyone he proposed, I'm the guy that asks, "So, what did she say?

I'm funny that way.

Where do weirdos ride their bicycles?

Psycho-paths. (as told by one of my coworkers)