How does Ohm conduct an orchestra?

Standing on his head!

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call a man who can't stand?

Neal

What does NASCAR stand for?

Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-rednecks (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. Sorry if it happens to be a repost.)

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What did one earring say to the other?

You go on a head, i'll just hang round 'ere

Why was the deaf man sighing and shaking his head in disgust when he looked over at his next door neighbour?

Because she was *airing her dirty laundry*!!!

Conduct Jokes More Conduct Jokes

What do you call a mammoth who conducts an orchestra?

Tuskanini.

What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?

Ohm Jokes More Ohm Jokes

What do electricians say when they meditate?

Ohm...

Why don't many buddhists work in the railroad industry?

They have too many ohms to be good conductors.

Orchestra Jokes More Orchestra Jokes

What do you call a mammoth who conducts an orchestra?

Tuskanini.

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!